“People take different roads seeking fulfilment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.”So, on chatango, I tend to get a lot of guys in their 20's, maybe a few in their early 30's, who will ask me what I'm doing with my life persistently. Today I chatted with a man from Singapore who asked me if I was in college and proceeded to ask why and insist college is good for my future despite my already mentioning that I can't afford it. I mean, it's nice that you seem to be so concerned about my future and education but why are you so concerned, anyway? I mean, we're total strangers, you know nothing about me, so... why does it matter?
So, here is my life right now:
I'm in a rut. I'm lazy and have allergies and asthma and clinical depression and currently I am concerned with dealing with those first, especially the depression. I don't have a job, and I don't know what I want to do in terms of a career and making a living. I don't actually have an interest in going to college, I've had my fill of school and if one day I do want to attend college, fine, maybe then I'll go, but it's just not something I would like to deal with right now. Plus, I mean, like I stated before, I can't afford it, and I don't want to deal with the stress and pressure of student loans. I have an idea of what I want in life, where I want to be, but for right now I'm just trying to figure out how to get there.
And by pressuring me you're essentially making it harder to figure it out. I need my own time and space to figure myself out, what I want for my future and all of that stuff. You can't honestly expect someone to figure that stuff out by the time they're 18, can you? That's ludicrous and way too much pressure because for a lot of people, when you turn 18 and don't have a fucking clue as to what you want and where you want to go, you're looked at like you're a failure.
Like, due to my current state, my dad looks down on me, insisting that unless I get a job I don't want, or marry a very rich guy, I won't be able to survive on my own once my parents die. That's so shitty of you to say or imply, do you realize that? That's NOT motivating, that's making me feel shitty about myself, my capabilities, and my life.
It's like giving someone an incredibly long list of things that they want to do and then giving them 5 minutes to choose something when that's not even enough time to read the whole list. I am 20 years old, not 45. Not 32. Not in my 50's or 60's. 20. I am still pretty young and I would like time to think about my own life, rather than being pressured from a young age to figure it out to the point where I find myself in a job I hate, feeling miserable. I don't want that, that's a shitty life. I don't give a single fuck about being rich, or having a big ass house and amazing clothes and thousands of shoes and a cool car. I want a life where I'm happy, in a house that I love, with a car that gets me to where I need to be, with someone I adore and want to spend my life with, and I'm not only happy, I'm content and like where I am, and I'm not going to get that by listening to everyone saying 'get a job, or go to school'.
First and foremost, while I'm figuring out what I want, and where I want to be, I want to travel. With my friends. Around the country or even the world. I want to see as much as I can before I settle down with a career. I want this:
"People will kill you over time, and how they’ll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like “be realistic." --Dylan Moran
The last thing I need is to go through life with a job and having settled down at an early age, never having done what I wanted to do because people told me to be realistic and put pressure on me to do things NOW and then sit down one day and look back on it all and just be filled with this overwhelming regret and resent and wish I could just go back and change everything.
"ive lost all motivation to do anything these days and people dont understand they just tell me to get motivated yeah sure let me go down to the store and grab a bottle of purpose in life"
"im stressed because i don’t want to be a nurse or a teacher or a lawyer i just want to read books and listen to music and travel and drink coffee but there’s so much pressure to become successful in terms of money and my career and i don’t want to do any of that"
"Does anyone else find it odd that our society expects 14-year-old kids to know what jobs they will want for the rest of their lives, but doesn’t believe an adult woman when she says she doesn’t want to be a mother?"
"i hate how you’re just born out of nowhere and you’re forced to go to school and get education so you can get a job what if i wanted to be a duck"
"i dont like the fact that u are literally forced into this world with no choice whatsoever and then youre forced to do all this school and work and job stuff its just kind of dumb"